A favorite bit of seasonal verse in our family first appeared in Cricket magazine sometime in the 1970s. The author's name is Anthony something. In spite of the injustice to him, I'm just too ashamed to write Cricket again to inquire about it, when I already have twice and mislaid the info. Here is the poem to the best of my recollection. Note the moral.
Horace's Christmas Disappointment
(Inquire of Cricket magazine for the author)
Young Horace Giraffe on Christmas Eve
Put out his stocking to receive
Whatever Santa Claus might bring.
You may indeed be wondering
What sort of size such stockings are,
Since even small giraffes are far
Bigger than quite a tall man is.
Young Horace Giraffe had measured his
And found it stretched 5 feet or so
From ample top to roomy toe.
What piles and piles of presents he
Imagined packed there presently!
A hundred tangerines. A bunch
Of ripe bananas for his lunch.
5 watermelons, 50 figs,
The most delicious juicy sprigs,
Plucked from the tops of special trees,
With leaves as sweet as honeybees.
And in the very bottom, some
Chocolates, filled with candied rum.
Alas, poor Horace! Christmas day
Dawned and he rose from where he lay
To snatch the stocking from his bed
But though it bulged, he felt with dread—
How light it was! –He reached inside—
And then he very nearly died.
Inside the stocking, almost half
The size of Horace was a scarf.
A useful present, yes I know,
But oh! It was a bitter blow!
The scarf was fully ten yards long
And striped and bright and very strong.
It filled the stocking tip to toe.
And Horace was quite filled with woe.
The moral is: A useful present in stockings is rather seldom pleasant.
Put out his stocking to receive
Whatever Santa Claus might bring.
You may indeed be wondering
What sort of size such stockings are,
Since even small giraffes are far
Bigger than quite a tall man is.
Young Horace Giraffe had measured his
And found it stretched 5 feet or so
From ample top to roomy toe.
What piles and piles of presents he
Imagined packed there presently!
A hundred tangerines. A bunch
Of ripe bananas for his lunch.
5 watermelons, 50 figs,
The most delicious juicy sprigs,
Plucked from the tops of special trees,
With leaves as sweet as honeybees.
And in the very bottom, some
Chocolates, filled with candied rum.
Alas, poor Horace! Christmas day
Dawned and he rose from where he lay
To snatch the stocking from his bed
But though it bulged, he felt with dread—
How light it was! –He reached inside—
And then he very nearly died.
Inside the stocking, almost half
The size of Horace was a scarf.
A useful present, yes I know,
But oh! It was a bitter blow!
The scarf was fully ten yards long
And striped and bright and very strong.
It filled the stocking tip to toe.
And Horace was quite filled with woe.
The moral is: A useful present in stockings is rather seldom pleasant.
